Time meant nothing.
Space meant nothing.
Direction meant nothing.
Arden was becoming by turns angrier and more hysterical about what Brian had done to him, especially, ESPECIALLY since Brian had somehow managed to pocket his wristwatch somewhere along the way.
At first he had paced around, plotting some sort of revenge. Eventually he had gotten bored with that, so he went exploring. However, everywhere he went looked, felt, smelt the same as where he started, which is to say, it didn't look, feel, or smell like anything. Arden had never realized that there could be so much nothing in one place. "This is worse than North Dakota," he thought. Resigned, he returned as close to his starting point as he could figure, and waited.
He was half dozed off when he felt a disturbance in the nothing. Like viscous oil, the nothing rippled slightly as a head pushed through it into view. Then an arm came through, and a second head. With a silent, fluid motion it came into full view and began to tiptoe toward Arden. It was short, dwarfen, and misshapen, with two heads, set back to back, but with long, rather flexible necks, and four arm, each pair facing in opposite directions. It looks, Arden thought, like siamese hobbits, joined at the spine.
It/they were only five feet away when Arden lifted his head and turned toward them/it. The creature(s) jumped visibly.
"Whoa!!! Its awake!"
"Run away!!!"
"Hey, you told me that it was asleep!"
"I *thought* it was asleep!"
"Didn't you bother to check?"
"Look how BIG it is!"
"Mmmm hmmm."
It/they scurried quickly away, arguing with itself/each other in almost identical whiny nasel voices, until it stood about twenty feet away.
"Whew! That was close!" they said in unison, shaking their heads and wiping the sweat off of each other's brow's.
"Um, who are you?" Arden asked.
| "I'm John. | ||
| "And I'm John." | ||
| "We're giants." | "We're giants." | |
| "Yup." | "Mmmm hmmm." | |
| "No doubt about it." | "No-Sir-Ee-Bob." | |
| "That's small-b Bob." | "No it isn't." | |
| "Well, yeah. But its not THAT Bob." | "Yeah. Not the Bob you're thinking of." |
They looked at itself and nodded in agreement.
"You don't look like giants to me," Arden said, rather dubiously.
| "Things here are not always what they seem." | "We might be giants." | |
| "Yeah, we might." | "After all, the owls are not what they seem." | |
| "Not that Bob, either." | "What?" | |
| You know, THAT Bob." | "Oh *no*! Not that Bob at all. | |
| Its not either of those Bobs." | ||
| "Its a different Bob." | "Yup." | |
| "Well..." | "Actually, its not really a Bob at all." | |
| "Actually, its just a phrase." |
Arden was starting to relax. So he kinda leaned back on the aether and said "Well, um, what can I do for you, uh, two?"
| "Oh! Well..." | ||
| "Since you're offering..." | "It won't take you long..." | |
| "Just a minute really..." |
"Shouldn't be a problem then, I suppose."
| "HEY! ALRIGHT!" | "Thats really sweet of you." | |
| "Yeah. Most people get kinda upset when you ask them to off themselves." | "But not you." | |
| "What a sport." |
"Off myself?" Arden's voice cracked on the 'self', not with fear, but with incredulity.
| "Awful nice of you." | ||
| "Dinnah is soived!" |
"Excuse me. I don't think that I'll be doing that."
| "You promised!" | "Yeah." |
Arden took a couple of steps toward it/them. They retreated a similar distance.
"I don't think that I'm ready to become dinner to a couple of might-be giants. Not today. But thanks for the offer."
The tiny giants sighed together, in harmony.
| >"I guess dinner will have to wait." | "Until you go to sleep." | |
| "Yes-Sir-Ee-Bob." | "Hey, stop with the Bob thing." | |
| "I didn't say it, you said it." | "Did not." |
They gathered up and formed some of the aether into a small sofa and sat down to wait.
| "Did I ever tell you the one..." | ||
| "Yup." | "Pretty funny, though!" |
John rolled his eyes as John chuckled and nudged John in the ribs.